"Healthy Relationships"

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Discussion

1 Samuel 18:1–3 KJV 1900
And it came to pass, when he had made an end of speaking unto Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. And Saul took him that day, and would let him go no more home to his father’s house. Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul.
What do you think it means “there souls were knit together”?
What things cause us to become instantly repelled or connected to someone?
How does focusing on ourselves detract from our relationships with others?
What does loving others as ourselves really look like in our relationships?

The Foundation of Healthy Relationships

God gives us a blueprint for successful relationships.
We must first love God with all.
This first act of obedience helps with the second, love our neighbor as ourselves.
Matthew 22:35–40 KJV 1900
Then one of them, which was a lawyer, asked him a question, tempting him, and saying, Master, which is the great commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.
How shall we love our God? (verse 37) ___________________________________________________________
How do we demonstrate loving the Lord in our life? ___________________________________________________________
What is the second greatest commandment? (verse 39) ___________________________________________________________
Why do you think Jesus added the second when asked what is the greatest singular commandment? ___________________________________________________________
Love God with all. Let’s let that sink in.
Our vertical relationship must be right before our lateral.
We need relationships. God seen it wasn’t good for man to be alone.
Who is my neighbor? -Near by-

The Enduring Power of Love

1 Corinthians 13:1–7 NLT
If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing. Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
What are we without love? (verses 1-3) ___________________________________________________________
What are some aspects of love? (verses 4-7) ___________________________________________________________
Which of the attributes of love do you think are the easiest to live out? ___________________________________________________________
Which are most difficult? ___________________________________________________________
All healthy Christian relationships depend on the same component, a Christlike love for others.
With Christ’s love we are patient, kind, and keep no record of wrongs.
To love other as our self, we must first love our selves.
Patience
Kindness
Contentedness
Humility
Encouraging
Forgiving
Honest
Protective and Trusting
Hopeful and Enduring

Boundaries for Safe Relationships

Not every relationship should be fostered in our lives.
Having love for others does not mean allowing them to hurt or use us.
With God’s wisdom and compassion, we learn to set boundaries for people who are self centered or seeking their own good.
Proverbs 27:12 KJV 1900
A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself; But the simple pass on, and are punished.
What will the wise do when confronted with a dangerous situation? (Proverbs 27:12) ___________________________________________________________
What types of situations would be considered dangerous? ___________________________________________________________
What types of behaviors could be considered unhealthy or unsafe? ___________________________________________________________
What would be considered a toxic relationship? ___________________________________________________________

The Responsibilities within Relationships

Conflict within a relationship is inevitable.
We are responsible for investing in our relationships, growing together, and enduring difficult times.
This commitment results in deeply connected bonds.
Ecclesiastes 4:9–12 KJV 1900
Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up. Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone? And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
What should a person do when a friend falls? (verse 10) ___________________________________________________________
What is not easily broken? (verse 12) ___________________________________________________________
What could a threefold cord represent? ___________________________________________________________
What are ways we can help our friends and family? ___________________________________________________________

Closing

How do you know if a relationship is positive (lifts you up) or negative (brings you down)?
How do you address relationships that are negative and harmful to you?
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